*SI wakes up and pulls his head out of the couch. We see that he has a 5:00 shadow.*

SI: Oooh, my head. Wh-what happened last night?

*DR is sitting in the recliner next to the couch with a pipe that became Sherlock Homes' trademark pipe when a guy needed a pipe he could use while he was talking. He blows bubbles out of it.*

DR: Well, you drank 500 12-packs of Dr. Pepper, ran around screaming that Democratic elephants wanted to eat your hair and ran at a speed of Mach 2 into a wall.

SI: And this was last night?

DR: No, this was three nights ago at the Christmas party.

SI: Well, why does my shirt have vomit on it?

DR: Oh, that's my fault. Me and WR were having a contest to see how far we could get our fingers down our throat before throwing up. I lost.

SI: Hey, when'd we get over 900 hits?

DR: Oh, good question.

WE'RE SOOOO CLOSE TO GETTING 1000 HITS!!!! W0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000T!!!1
-Sane Intolerant-